Smooth Rolling

On Thursday night I had to go to Walmart after I had fed the cows and horses and I was a little bit tired, and not feeling real well. Something unexpected happened that really lifted my spirits. When I picked out a shopping cart and finally pried it loose from the others I was surprised at how smoothly it rolled. It just glided out of the cart area as I turned toward the Pharmacy area. I couldn’t help the big grin plastered across my face as I pushed it effortlessly down the aisle.

It felt so good that I turned by the toys and took it for a test drive. It was like driving a new car off the lot, after you have been driving your ten year old, two hundred thousand mile bucket of bolts. You see, I didn’t know that they actually made shopping carts that would roll like this. I wondered if I could buy the cart and store it somewhere in the store like a golf cart in a cart shed. I put the cart through its paces, with some sharp right and left turns. It accelerated easily and had plenty of power. Wait a minute, I was getting carried away there.

I know that you think I’m crazy to get so excited about a shopping cart, but if you had to use one every day at our Walmart you would understand. I wonder if maybe there is a big sister Walmart somewhere that gives her worn out shopping carts to our little sister Walmart. I consider myself lucky if I wind up with a cart that all of the wheels roll. It is to be expected that the cart will vibrate like a rototiller and intermittently veer to one side or the other, while emitting various shrieks and squeals. I have found that if both rear wheels or both front wheels are locked up the cart is still usable. Just tilt it to where only the rolling wheels touch the floor. It is best if it is the rear wheels that roll, since it is easier to tilt the cart backward than lift it forward. It could be a problem if the cart was very full, but if you are only shopping for one or two day’s groceries it’s OK. If one rear wheel and one front wheel are locked up it’s best to try another cart, unless they happen to both be on the same side and you are strong enough to push the cart around tilted sideways like a stunt driver.

You may be wondering why I go shopping nearly every day. I wonder that too. I remember when Becky, the girls and I would go shopping on payday, and buy enough groceries to last a week. Nowadays Becky is working out of the home and I try to help out. I think that when a man shops he reverts to the primitive, hunter-gatherer mentality in his genetic code. When I see enough in the cart to feed us for more than a day, my brain just shuts down. I can’t think of anything more to buy, or anything more important to do, than to just get it back to the cave….er home. So I buy just enough groceries to keep Becky from having to, and so few that I’m caught in a recurring cycle.

Well anyway, it was nice to push a fully functioning shopping cart for once. I loaded it down with thirty dollars worth of groceries, and it felt so good that I pushed it all the way out to the truck, even though it was only two sacks.